Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Begin With The End In Mind.....

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters
Compared to what lies within us

Oliver Wendell Holmes.

I was interviewing someone for an article recently and I finished by asking them this question: “How would you like to be remembered?” They paused for a moment, and then answered. It got me thinking: How would I like to be remembered? This is a question I had never really asked myself. Or, morbidly still, what would I like people to say about me at my funeral. If my eulogy involved my nicely decorated house, great writing or how well I dressed I was – I’ve failed. But if those closest to me honour with words like kindness, compassion, generousity, love for God, commitment to her family etc – then I’ll be smiling in my casket. In Stephen Covey’s best selling book: ‘Seven Habits of Highly Effective people,’ he takes this thought even further.

See yourself going to a funeral of a loved one. Picture yourself driving to the funeral parlor or chapel, parking your car and getting out. As you walk inside the building, you notice flowers, soft music playing (which sounds like that favourite song of yours). You see the faces of your family and friends. You sense the loss.

As you walk down to the front of the chapel and look inside the casket, you suddenly come face to face with yourself. This is your funeral. All of these people have come to honour you and to express feelings of love and appreciation for your life.

As you take your seat and wait for the service to begin, you look at the program in your hand. There are to be four speakers: a family member, a friend, a work colleague and someone from your church. Now think deeply. What would you like each of these speakers to say about you and your life? What kind of mother, wife would you like those words to reflect. What kind or friend were you or working associate. What character would you like them to have seen in you? What contributions, what achievements do you want to be remembered for? What difference would you like to have made?

Doing this exercise, as sad as it seems, can often re-set your internal navigation system. Maybe you have to make a u turn, or simply a short right turn, before the automated voice inside you says: “your destination is ahead.” It’s never too late to change. Start now. Begin tomorrow with the end in mind.

Nicki Partridge

3 comments:

thefamilyroom said...

Nicki,
You have me thinking. I love things that help you bring perspective into your life at just the right time. Thanks Nic.
Susan

Anonymous said...

I heard this song on the radio yesterday with the lyrics
"it's not what you had, it's not who you knew it's how you
lived".
Thanks for the reminder Nic.

Annie x

Anonymous said...

Excellent thought! Another exercise is write a letter to your children (or future children) telling them what is really important in life and then use that as a plumb line to see if your life is in alignment with that which you truly value.

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