Mother's Day - Honoring Mothers Everywhere

Today on 'Coffee with Susan and Friends' in prep for Mother's Day we honored mothers everywhere. As guests on the show, I had my own mother, Isabel, and my sister, Katherine Gagne. We had calls from some amazing people including my older brother, Robert, who was, in fact, born on Mother's Day some 46 years ago. Robert said some beautiful things about the listening ear and insight of a mother. My younger brother, Peter, who has down syndrome, called in and in his own way said what he says to our mother almost daily, definitely a statement you will want to hear.

As I closed the show I said something to my mother about aging and what she's teaching us. Reann called in and thanked her mother and others in her world. The show was a tear jerker for sure and tugged at every heart string. I pulled out some of the conversation that was happening in the chat room, so friends ... have a listen and let your heart be warmed.

To mothers everywhere, we honor you, we pay tribute, we thank you and we LOVE YOU.

Now to the Emails and Tweets:

From Lisa:

Hey Susan! What a great idea!

Sorry I won't be able to be on the call, but I thought I would take a quick moment to send a message.

When I was younger, and especially in my teens, I wasn't that close with my mom. I didn't see all that she did for me each day to make my life easier. I took it all for granted, and until I was in my late 20s, didn't really see how much she did for me over the years.

In my mid 30s, I had some marital problems, and when I opened up to my mom about them, she was there for me 100%. She encouraged me to work at my marriage and to realize that I had a great man as a husband. When I was having a bad/blue day, she would offer to take my young children for me so I could have time to cry if I needed to or to just be alone.

I don't know that we can ever repay our mothers for all they do while we grow up. I try every day now to at least call her, and I make a point of seeing her every week, a few times a week where possible. She is getting to an age now where she needs me to help her and to take care of her and I know that I'll be here for her, just as she was there for me when I needed her love and attention.

Thanks Mom!

From Barry:

My mother means everything to me. She always believes the best & loves selflessly. She's my hero. I love & miss her so much.

From Lori:

Hi Susan

Wish I was going to be home tomorrow to catch your show. I am sure it will be great. As Mother Day approaches I think of my Mom more frequently. It has been a year and a bit since she passed away and I still miss her every day. So many times I have caught myself thinking that I will have to phone her to ask about a recipe or about how to fix something or just to say hello...only to realize that I can't ever do that again.

I am very grateful for the time that her and I had together near the end. I value the lessons learned from her and hope that I have passed them on to my children.

She raised eight children on her own after my father died. My oldest brother was 19 years old and the youngest was three. I still marvel at how she was able to take care of all of us on her own. I would ask her about it sometimes and she would just smile and say that she just did what she had to do........a lot of hard work and sometimes a big stick! HA HA HA I don't ever recall hearing Mom complain about the cards life dealt her. She is one of the strongest women that I knew.

When Mom came to live at the Nursing Home in my town I was able to go and visit her everyday after work. I always tried to be cheerful when I went to see her even if some days I was not necessarily feeling that way. I figured that she did not need to hear about my tough days at work. She had always been such an independant woman all her life and now she was totally dependant on others to help her with everything from her personal care to feeding her. It was very difficult for her to deal with. But no matter how hard I tried to hide my feelings from her she always knew when I had had a bad day. Mom could not speak very well due to the stroke but she spoke volumns with her beautiful blue eyes. On my bad days she would reach out and pull my head down onto her lap and stroke my hair so gently. Of course I always felt better after....what child wouldn't after feeling their mothers loving touch. I learned that you are never to old to need your mother.

Anyway Susan I could go on for pages talking about what a great woman my Mom was. She was loving, kind, considerate, funny...the list goes on and on. Feel free to edit out what ever you want. I know I can get carried away when I start writing.

Have a great show and I look forward to listening to it tomorrow night.

From Jane:

My mum (Betty) is unbelievably strong despite a significant physical disability and being restricted by pain all the time, never complains. She has always had such a heart for the underdog and the downtrodden and is an activist at 75!! I like to think that I am a little like her in this way....there is a pretty constant undercurrent of tension between us as there can be between mothers and daughters, but when I choose not to irritated by the petty stupid things and be the bigger person, she is an inspiration!

From Sam:

One thing I have always loved about my mum (Pam) is the wonderful feeling that when my kids are with her, I know they are safe. There is no baby sitter like your Mum. Also, I am forever grateful for her prayers and her commitment to her children.

We would love to hear about your mum. Send us a comment and share her with us and join us as we celebrate Mother's everywhere.

Have a great weekend everyone.

Susan J Sohn

What’s in a manual?

For those of you who have husbands who travel with work, you will appreciate this story. For those of you who don’t, but have found yourself figuring out something on your own, you too will enjoy.

In the early years of our marriage and before children, both my husband and I travelled extensively with our jobs. Now 15 plus years into our marriage and three children later, it is he who has continued the frequent work travel and I am now able to pick and choose which trips I will take. Most of mine now surround thefamilyroom and the work we do.

When my husband is away, I like to refer to myself as a ‘low-maintenance wife’. Simply meaning, I’m able to handle the home front (mostly with ease) and I can manage the curve balls that are thrown my way. The children and I slip into our routine, we have lots of fun and we release Daddy to do what he needs to do whilst away. In saying that, there have been a few teary calls over the years, children missing him at bedtime, a toilet that has overflowed or a math equation that needs explaining – and mum has just had it!! Dad to the rescue and all is well. Secretly, I know he loves knowing that he is needed.

Recently, we were mid-way through a 10-day trip for Philip (my husband). One thing I’m not used to handling is the automotive department in our home. I leave that to Philip and he leaves it to the experts … probably a good idea. This particular week, however, my window washer light came on, indicating it needed a top-up. I ignored it for two days and finally decided that this was just one more task I could handle. After much thought, I decided it was time to get the job done. I did what any girl with car trouble knows to do ... I phoned my dad. I asked what I needed to buy and where I would find the location point for the fluid. Of course, I knew it was under the hood but where? My dad explained and I made like I knew exactly what to do.

Another day passed and the washer fluid I’d bought was still swinging around in the back of the car at every turn, serving as a constant reminder of the task at hand. But I still wasn’t quite sure where I needed to put the fluid. I hadn’t even opened the hood, being unable to locate the hood release anywhere in the car (who would have thought it would be hidden on the side wall beside the foot brake)!

Later in the day, on the phone to my cousin, Angela, I shared my washer fluid woes, asking if she knew where it went. “Maybe check the manual, it should tell you,” she replied. At this point, I began to laugh hysterically. I was laughing at the fact that we truly are those girls (and I know there are men out there too with the same problem) who just plug things in, set them up by ‘eye’ and our own understanding, whilst ignoring the manual that is usually sitting right beside us.

So, after a read of the index and a few flips through the pages, I successfully filled my car with windscreen wiper fluid. No more warning lights flashing insistently and no more bottles sliding around on the back seat. Rather, you can see me coming a mile off because I have the cleanest windscreen on the road. It’ll probably need filling again soon, I’m using so much of it. My reward.

So, what’s in a manual? Everything you need to know!!! I FINALLY discovered that.

Susan

What Scares You?

Over the years, I have read a statement that is usually bundled with the kind of encouraging and challenging words often stumbled upon in a Hallmark card or the like. The phrase I'm referring to is Do Something Each Day That Scares You.

Upon first discovering this collection of words, I wasn't sure what it meant. I'm not a big believer in allowing fear to take up residence in my life. I eventually read through the words, between the lines, and I realised this was not referring to a scary movie or standing alone in a forest after dark, instead it was a challenge directed at the core of our being. I have since come to love this statement. It has truly stirred something deep within and has caused me to challenge myself to push my personal limits and boundaries.

Why have I embraced this statement and chosen to do something each day that scares me? I do so simply because I want my life to continue growing and strengthening and I understand that confidence is built through going beyond what is comfortable. I don't want to become complacent and 'ok' with the status quo, rather I want to be pushed, shoved at times (if necessary) and moved to increase, whether that be in my mental capacity, physical ability or spiritual strength. Growth and determination, I believe, are two essential ingredients that we all need to live strong, confident lives.

So today, my challenge to you, and as always to myself, is to do something that scares each one of us. What scares you will look very different from what scares me and that's okay. I suggest you begin small and allow your confidence to build. Starting small may look like taking a course you've thought about, tackling your finances, speaking to someone who may intimidate you, voicing your opinion and involving yourself in decision-making or even applying for a new job. Only you will know what truly scares you and what it is that will challenge you to step beyond your usual limits. Subsequently, only you will know when you have achieved something and seen confidence build. Understand that this could be a total retraining of your current thinking, so give yourself some time and space to see true change and confidence emerge.

What am I doing today that scares me? I'm making phone calls in search of a publisher for a children's book I've written. I'm scared and I'm excited about the possibility and the ‘what-ifs’ in life. Today is a great day.

Susan

Where Do Great Stories Come From?

Have you ever found yourself totally captivated by a good story? Do you have people in your life who just seem to ooze great story after great story? Their lives seem to be so full of excitement, hilarity and the unexpected. At times you find yourself quietly living vicariously through their journeys, near misses and outrageous encounters, when even the somewhat ordinary becomes the extraordinary.

If you have answered yes to any portion of the above, I have a secret I want to share with you. This secret will take you from being the listener and the one who is possibly living through the stories of others, to becoming the one exploding with excitement – others hanging off your every word.

Before I share this secret, you must first understand something very important. Once this secret has been revealed to you, it is your responsibility to allow your stories to ignite something within others. Simply put, you need to pay it forward and share the excitement and wonder of your stories with those in your world. You need to help others step beyond their comfort zones.

What is this secret I’m talking about?

Here it is … every great story has been lived by the storyteller. Meaning the storyteller has stepped beyond his or her comfort zone and has lived something that is worth telling about. The clincher is, most times living through the story isn't easy but at the end, after time has passed, these life experiences become the great stories that we all hang on to, that we share and pass on through the generations. These stories become the ones that we never tire of hearing. These stories are usually filled with excitement, anticipation, disappointment, joy, at times pain, the hilarious moments and the lessons that were learned along the way.

So friends, if you are, in fact, one who feels like your life stories are limited then I encourage you to step beyond what feels safe, and truly engage life and what it throws your way. Dare to be different and dare to go where you’ve only dreamed of going. Become one who shares the story, because a great life story always gives another the courage to live a louder, stronger, more explosive life.

So, where do great stories come from? They come from lives well spent. In these turbulent times can I (again) suggest that we spend our lives well and allow our existence to make a difference in this world? Let the stories of your life unfold and know that the generations will thank you for stepping beyond your comfort zone.

I can’t wait to hear the stories that will be shared in the days, weeks, months and years to come.

Susan